little lies without significance

I went to see my family. I have to work in this district and planned to stay one more day with my family. Then I decided to come here one day before, that was today. But I told him, I have to work here today too.

I lied. Because I don’t want him to reproach me that I have not enough time for him, that I’m so much away, that I just come home for sleeping. He will go to meet his family end of this month and stay there some days. I’m more than OK with this, I enjoy some time without him so much. I like to miss him. He doesn’t share this attitude.

It is not just this time, I also lied when I bought some equipment for paddling because I was embarrassed. It doesn’t make any sense, he would be more than glad to help my buy some paddling stuff, but for me it is kind of stealing his hobby, when it is getting important to me too. I also lied about still having contact (mails) with my exfriend, even when he told me he is OK with it (but doesn’t like it).

Lying is bad and I feel bad every time I “have” to. I want to be a good person, and a good girlfriend. He is so good, there is no use in not telling the truth.

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