Before we moved together I visited him in his town, so I can’t spend time with my friends, or he came and I had to “take care” of him. In the beginning he was to shy to meet my friends, later we had some other differences how to handle the other one’s friends.
Actually I never tried to get contact to his friends and he supported this. On the other hand, he was angry that I don’t want him to become friends with my friends. I mean these are people I trust, I tell them so much – also about him and our relationship. When he started to write e-mails with a friend of mine, we had our first real fight. I also ignored my friend for some time, for me her behaviour was kind of betrayal.
Last christmas I gave him a piece of paper with my closest friends’ telephone numbers. But I think I can’t comprehend my overcoming.
Now living together we still don’t see each other a lot during the week and kind of have to save our precious weekend time for each other. So I’m still not free to just arrange a meeting with a friend. And we also don’t talk enough about our plans and expectations, so mostly we stay at home and often don’t know what to do but are afraid to plan something. This may be the biggest problem at the moment: we both project expectations on each other which the other may/probably doesn’t have and therefrom feel restricted.